Learning to identify our bent nickel beliefs is much easier than most people think.
Bent nickel beliefs are what I call “flat-world” beliefs in that they significantly distort reality. For example, living our life believing that the world is flat in the 21st century is guaranteed to present us with some significant problems.
Never look stupid. Criticism should be avoided at all costs. These two more common bent nickel, flat world beliefs are guaranteed to make life difficult at best.
Let’s add another very common bent nickel belief. I must always correct others whenever I don’t agree with them. This one is certain to bring some interesting problems into our relationships with others…and none of the problems will be pleasant to deal with.
See the pattern?
All of these examples are common bent nickel beliefs. It will be a rare reader that hasn’t used one or more of these bent nickel beliefs at one time or another….probably within the last few days.
If we put any of these flat world beliefs at the base of our life there is no way that we can avoid pain, frustration, or a sense of powerlessness. There is also no way that these core beliefs could ever help us establish or maintain a healthy self-esteem or self-identity.
Bent nickel beliefs are simple to locate and identify in our thinking…simply look for the pain and unhappiness in our life. When we identify the pain in our life, we need to take the time to sit with it and own it as our own problem. If we are willing to be totally honest with our self, the bent nickel belief that is causing the pain and unhappiness will eventually become obvious.
Still having a problem identifying the bent nickel beliefs that are messing up your life?
We need to ask for help. Ask your spouse or your children. Ask a close friend. It’s not unusual for those close to us to have clear insight into the bent nickel belief or beliefs that are causing us discomfort.
There’s a good chance we may not like what they have to say, but be sure to thank them for their wisdom. Their insight could be the key to putting us on the path to happiness and success. In other words, don’t kill the messenger or “yea-but” their suggestions…..especially when we have asked them for their input.
Remember, it takes great courage and commitment to change the way we think…but no matter how hard a person tries, no matter how many attempts they make, it is virtually impossible to build a successful and happy life when we have a bent nickel belief residing at the base of our thinking. So learn to embrace change. Be honest with ourselves. Own our own pain. It’s one of the most important gifts we can give ourselves.
What we learn about our self will only be useful if we are fully committed to being happy and successful. The insight we get may be interesting, but without a true commitment to change the way we think, it will have little or no real impact on our life. It will simply be one more interesting idea that has no ability to help us achieve happiness or success.