What Are You Resisting? – Insights from the Wilderness #99

What are you resistingIf you are struggling with negative emotions you are resisting something. You are unconsciously at war with reality. It’s time to wake up.

What ever you’re resisting is causing your stress, your anxiety, your unhappiness, your depression, your anger, your impatience, and your irritation. Or you could turn it around and say if you’re stressed, anxious, or unhappy, you can be certain that you are unconsciously resisting something in your life.

If you want to truly enjoy your life, stop your unconscious resistance to whatever it is you’re resisting. Find out what that “something” is.

That was certainly the case for me. I spent years training as a therapist learning about neurosis, character disorders, phobias, compulsions, and the root causes of human mental health issues. I worked with clients; I did my own therapy, and I read all the books on therapeutic techniques, concepts, and healing techniques I could find.

But something was missing. I was practicing what I had been taught, but my client’s lives were not improving. They continued to struggle with anxiety and unhappiness. I also recognized that their struggles were mirroring my own attempts to find happiness and a sense of peace in my own life.

It wasn’t until I began studying the spiritual practices taught by the great Eastern spiritual teachers that I began to understand why so many of us struggle with unhappiness and stress. The lights came on. I began to “get it”. We are all caught up in the illusion that life is difficult.

But it isn’t. It’s only hard on our ego’s illusions.

The Goal Is Awakening, Not Healing

As I learned to integrate Eastern and Western mental health concepts and approaches into my work with clients it became clear that the primary cause of suffering in life was our reluctance to give up the unconscious distortions and illusions of childhood… that and a spiritual understanding of human development that was lacking in Western mental health psychotherapy training.

The insight that changed my life, and the life of my clients, was shifting from a goal of healing, to that of awakening.

As I shifted from a focus on Western psychotherapy and neurosis, to a more Eastern focus on the spiritual awakening of my client’s unconscious primitive (young) ego; the ego of their inner-child psyche, their lives began to improve.

As they changed their relationship with reality, their lives began to improve.

Instead of judgmentally resisting the reality of “what is”, they learned to accept the reality of “what is” with an open heart. Instead of trying to change the people in their lives, and attempting to get them to behave the way they “thought” they should behave, they learned to accept them for who they were.

Instead of changing the world, they began to change themselves.

As they began to awaken their consciousness and became consciously aware of their unconscious resistance to reality internally, they became less anxious. They began to enjoy their life.

Stop Resisting – It’s Just A Tree

Think about it. If you went for a walk in the forest and came upon a tree standing directly in front of you, would you begin to argue with the tree? Would you get upset or angry that the tree was in the path “you” wanted to take? Would you say, “My life is so unhappy! There is a tree standing right in front of me! This “always” happens to me. Poor me! I am so stressed! Life just absolutely, shouldn’t “be” this way.”

Would you consciously think to yourself  “if I get really, really, REALLY, upset, that will cause the tree to get out of my way”?

Of course not!  You would sound insane… even to yourself! Right?

You would accept the fact that the tree is just being a tree.

You would accept the fact that no matter how incredibly upset you might get, the tree is still going to be a tree standing in front of you.

And then you would calmly walk around the tree and continue on your journey. Right?

So why do you unconsciously assume that the person in your life who is behaving in a way “you” think is wrong is going to magically change just because you are really, REALLY upset?  Where is that written?

No matter how upset you might get, just like the tree, the people in life who upset you are just being who they are.

Summary: A Simple Spiritual Practice

The next time you find yourself unhappy or stressed in your life ask yourself the question “What am I resisting”? What is my ego resisting? And then think about a tree. Your life will immediately improve. Your ego will no longer be at war with the universe.

All negative feelings and suffering in life is caused by your resistance to the reality of  “what is”.

Don’t take my word for it. Just see it for yourself.

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